It can be very annoying to not be able to express yourself accurately when you want to. The heart starts to hurt, swallows become painful, breath increases and your tongue lies like a lazy dog in your mouth. Totally idle with unspoken words wrapped around it like saliva.
Dele always felt like that. He would sink away the pain in the thought of things he should have said when he had a chance. Then he'd do what his heart doesn't want him to do; walk away. Soon, it became an habit. He did it again and again till his reflexes aligned with it like an automatic response.
The day his friend, Peter, left without him and took all the cash he had, fully aware Dele's bank app was acting up. He was silent. He walked away. The day the course rep told him to represent his course mates and go to the lecturer's office even though that affected his result. He looked straight into the eyes of his course rep. Yearning for all the words he could say. For the best way to describe the hurt. No word found enough bearing in his mouth. Only in his head.
"Soro Soke" they say, but not all of us do. Most of us shy away when the deed is needed. We prefer a space we can control but sadly that could only be the space bar on our phones' keypad. We carry bold typing fingers with timid feets.
Dele could be you or me. Maybe you'd learn to speak up or not. This is a story whose ending you decide.
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